Tuesday, January 25, 2011


Sex Consent Form (For Male Protection)
aka Form 16xxx

I --------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------, herein referred to as 'SCREWEE' have agreed to have sex, hereafter referred to as 'THE ACT' with the bearer of this form, herein referred to as 'SCREWER' having accepted the following terms and conditions without any reservations.

1) That I, the screwee is of sound mind and that this decision has been reached without any undue coercion.

2) That I am not drank at the time of signing this form and that the bearer is NOT responsible for ascertaining my level of sobriety.

3) That the screwer is NOT responsible for any emotional, psychological, and imagined physical or moral damages that may emanate from the act.

4) That if the act is carried out at the screwer's house, I will produce minimal sounds to avoid alerting the screwer's neighbours and/or parents UNLESS otherwise agreed.

5) That I, the screwee, will leave the screwer's house at the first light of day if the act takes place at night and that any garments left behind will be discarded without further consultation with me.

6) That I, the screwee, WILL NOT request for Taxi money, airtime, breakfast or any other form of financial favours from the screwer because of this act, and that any such favours - if forthcoming - will be greatly appreciated.

7) That I will be an active participant during the act if I hope to get the satisfaction I crave. Said satisfaction, however, is not guaranteed.

8) That I will NOT hold the screwer responsible for any undue resultant alterations to any of my organs, insofar as they were utilized during the act.

9) That the screwer may choose to expel me from his house for any reason before, during or after the act for any reason, ESPECIALLY lack of proper hygiene.

10) That any missed periods springing off of this act will be my SOLE RESPONSIBILITY and will thus not be used in any way to get favours from the screwer, including - but not restricted to - marriage, child-support and/or rent.

11) And that I, the screwer, take full and total responsibility for lack of satisfaction of either party (screwee and screwer) and will not use any such lack thereof to bad mouth the screwer.

Sign here.


  1. just like a prenup in marriage, it would appear even outside marriage, terms and conditions must apply therein!

  2. He he...nice one Dee. So si hii basi itaitwa pre-'nap'? Ha ha :)

  3. ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Cheers man.

  4. @ Morpheus. He he. Nice one. Finally yo behind shows itself up on the blogosphere. Ulikuwa unangoja nini? Naps iive? :)


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