Middle Finger to The Facebook: A White Lights & Black Holes Missive

I received an email from a friend recently. She claims, with an emphasis on the "claims," and not on the claim, that she cannot write. I have long known this to be a totally skewed perception of her self. And so, in today's brand of Social Experiment gone ham, I decided to shock her system with a response. Not a public response to her missive, but a public display of it, edited as and where necessary.

Sorry love, if you're reading this; but I think you need a wake-up call. And the call is this. Woman! Wake up! You. can. right. 

Thank me after the noose is off my neck, will you? :)

If you feel the urge to, reader, do leave her a comment. I insist that she needs to give her brilliant mind a platform. Also, dear reader, if we are that friendly, you and I, that you happen to by some miracle figure out who I'm talking about, you had better learn the word.

The word is mum. Silencio. Silence. To the graves with it! Closed source. Shut up. Gob-smacked! As in I will smack your gob if you tattle. Like the hood, there shall be no snitching, contrary to which more force will be applied to your tender regions than can be physically borne. 

With love. And...now:

The Letter 

[Editor's edit:
To:          @french_freddy 

From:      Anone, Mass of Wandrous Wonder

Dear Freddy,]

I'm in one of those rare moods where my thoughts and fingers are in sync, so just in case I never get a chance to express this, either because I've forgotten or because I don't want to talk about it, here goes...

*switches off the radio just to write this; hmm ... this must be some sweet serious stuff these fingers want to convey*:

Item #1:

My initial reason for leaving Facebook was to test how long I can go without it. I'd initially made that promise to myself during Lent, but broke it; shattered it, rather. And it made me contemplate upon my ability to keep my word, because I've disappointed myself so many times lately - I'm not comfortable divulging the details right now, s'il vous plait - that I decided to not make any promises that I can't keep.

With reference to my Christian upbringing there is a verse in Ecclesiastes about it being better to not make a vow at all, than to make one and not keep it.

So I went cold turkey on Zuckerberg's bouncer baby on the morning of 4th April, partly motivated by a nightmare I had the night before. I can't remember what it was about right now; when I do I'll tell you. Plus my mind's propensity to over-interpret things saw that date as...special.

Special. It being 4/4. 

So I deactivated my account, and save for this one time I got a text from a friend asking me to check out some event or other, I have never looked back.

You should've seen me that day - I. was. RESTLESS!! I had cultivated this habit of checking my Facebook Timeline after every 5 minutes, seeking indulgence. 

From someone's status update, or a funny video. Or, when using my laptop, from chatting with whoever will be online at the time. 

I could feel the undercurrents of something being wrong with me, I just didn't know what. Logging off from Facebook, and living to see the next day, opened my eyes to my reality:

I was addicted to Facebook. 

It was my link to the outside world - to news, to events. To friends. To anything that will take me further from the inner truth that is inherent in my introverted nature; my propensity to NEVER tell anyone about my problems because I DON'T TRUST EASILY.

Granted, there aren't any Facebook Anonymous groups (yet), so I was faced with the task of looking for alternative means of mwenjoyo.

I turned to my e-books.

While reading a bunch of articles from the truckload of newsletters I've subscribed to, I bumped into so many books about personality - including the "Quiet..." one I e-mailed you [editor's note: which I am yet to read, tsk tsk tsk!] - that I decided to get lost in reading them. 

To this day I still haven't finished reading "Quiet..." [editor's note: pheeew!] yet I've finished reading 3 novels to date; a slow target, considering in Uni we were made to read that same number of books per WEEK. 

Because I'm reading that book intensely. Plus my laptop's dead, so I'm on a break :-)

I've learned a lot about myself from what I've read. Granted, I don't resonate with EVERYTHING that's in these e-books, but if I've not seen bits of myself in them I've seen elements of others' personalities described with such accuracy it's almost scary. 

I'm at the nadir in my life where fear's a non-issue - I've embraced a "Fuck it, bring it on" approach [editor's note: again, pheeeew! You're gonna love what I have hereby "brought on", no?] to the nuggets of knowledge inherent in these texts I've been reading. 

It's opened my eyes, and helped me understand the ideologies behind some of my actions, and others' responses to them. With regard to the latter, it's enabled me to tolerate my immediate family alongside members of my extended family, most of whom have been quick to talk shit about me without getting to know why I am the way I am, and why I do what I do. 

Telling me "I need prayers" doesn't move me any more - I'm losing my religion, a la REM. If you want to pray for me then PRAY FOR ME. Telling me "I need counselling" doesn't help either.

If you knew the amount of anger that's welled up inside when I hear these statements and the like, that has led, to the extreme, of harboring thoughts bordering homicide towards those who spew them from their buccal cavities. I came to understand, later on, why I've been having these thoughts:

I've been watching too many episodes of "Criminal Minds" 

:-)

So "Fuck it..." moves on to "Que sera, sera - whatever will be, will be". 

Live and let live. 

Not everyone is wired to have family as a support system, so I've accepted it and I'm moving on to seeking (psychological) support from a group of people I interact with on a regular basis: my friends.

Plus I'm glad I redirected my energies towards Twitter - my handle's been dormant, it was in need of some TLC.

In "Quiet..." Susan Cain talks extensively about introverts not necessarily being socially inept, but simply being overly sensitive to...stimulation. 

• Verbally, it explains why I can talk a lot at one time then go silent the next.  

• Visually, it helped me understand why I'm liking Twitter right now more than Facebook.  

• Tactile, it made me appreciate why I have issues with being touched unnecessarily.

Which brings me to: 

Item #2:

There are things I have seen friends do that surprised me. No, shocked me, really. I would stare at them like I'm looking at the sky or a photo of a Picasso painting - blankly. How some of them are my friends to this day is a humbling point for me, because I've said really cold things and they still have my back.

I have heard the "Oh you would both make such a cute couple" narrative, by the way [editor's note: haven't we all? No? Maybe just me then]. "You're both so smart, and have so much in common." 

I am telling you all this to get it off my chest, lest it festers into a pneumatic infection. And because you seem to be branching away from the romantic optimists - good for them by the way, and me, because my realistic nature needs such when I need to get away mentally. 

2013 is the year I'm focusing on me - Quality over Quantity:

1. I lost weight because I significantly reduced my intake of junk food (I last had your favourite snack in September 2012).
2. Switching off my phone when I'm reading or before I go to bed helps me concentrate on the content and on getting sufficient rest, respectively.
3. Getting off Facebook has diverted my focus from the need to attend to 800 odd people because they're in my Friends List, to those I regard as my bosom friends who I communicate with via e-mail, Skype, call or SMS. 

So...so far Freddy I can say that I feel the slow but steady inflow of peace in my being. And I'm loving it!! Being alive rocks! 

Item #3:

You know I love you like I love myself - and you know that I love myself A LOT [editor's note: I'm counting on you remembering those words when you see these words published].  

So I was quite concerned when I saw you smoking again [editor's note: shit. now everybody knows] and especially when you said you're smoking again A LOT. Wallahi I can hunt down that Irrationality Switch I lost in some section of my brain, and start going HAM on you and yours like those chicks on Gossip Girl. 

If nicotine is what gets your juices flowing, then...do what you must. 

*shrugs shoulders* 

But let no one, NO ONE, even me, ever influence your decisions to give up on stuff that's going to mess up your health, physically and mentally. 

While I'm on a mothering note please note that I need God-papa to stay on this earth for more years, to tell my children good things about me. Though we will NEVER tell them about the things that went down in their grandfather's car in 2012 - we shall DIE with that info! [editor's note: especially how I lost my phone that night...]

[editor's note:

 Signed,

Anone, Mass of Wandrous Wonder]

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Cometh the Hour Cometh the Money – Mentoring The Next Generation of Creativez

       

: Courtesy of a #CreativesMeetUp by @TheCreativez

The evolution of startup fever in Africa is fast upon us. And with the Internet leveling the playing field for entrepreneurs, at least in the way of resources, it's safe to say that we the entrepreneurial few have no excuse whatsoever in our endeavours to make money, create jobs and build legacies. None that matter, and not in Kenya anyway. 

Why? Unless you've been living under a rock somewhere far far away, the intense hullabaloo on entrepreneurship will hardly have escaped you. It's in the Media everyday, on the Blogosphere every two seconds and - more relevant to this discussion - there have been myriad forums, conferences and meetups all over our celestial corporate sphere. Especially in Nairobi.
  


Seasoned thinkers and startup kings - the two, by the way, are not mutually exclusive - have poured in their opinions, intelligent and otherwise, on about every single aspect of starting [and running] a startup. There are business model generators accessible at the click of a button, inspirational videos with a futuristic blend of ideas, not to mention the very laudably celebrated TED Talks.

Nonetheless, an intelligent opinion - however brilliant - is still a guess. Mentor advice comes from so many corners to the young Kenyan entrepreneur, and should be considered mutually exclusive. There is, additionally, a wide array of agendas at play wherever mentorship is involved, ranging from innocent service to the obscenely manipulative...and everything in between.  

I read this post on econke titled Positive Role Models, the Endangered Species and found the following excerpt ridiculously appropriate, given the serendipitous nature of it's discovery:

Be a Role Model, Fill in the Void

I don’t care [about] your current standing in...society - the fame, money or even power.  [Nor] your awards, records broken or games won. 

If you are a lousy person, then you are a drag, shame, and curse on society. Your immediate family...your friends may subscribe to your antics...laugh at your behavior. [N]one of that, not even those trying to conceal your behaviour will change this fact. Period.

Bravo! Not only is it well said, but as any streetwise businessman will tell you, the amount of shafting currently ongoing in the nation's business scene dictates that you choose your partners, and mentors, with an almost supernatural degree of ingenuity. Much as there is a plethora of peddlers of the idea that "We’re all in this together – Mentoring The Next Generation", a good degree of that unified front is nothing but a front.

There are, however, a few genuine parties out there; A Few Good Men [and Women] whose dedication and business pedigree has been tried, tested, and over time found to be anything but wanting. One such forum is The Creativez (@thecreativez on Twitter). In my book, this far, they live up to their profile info on Twitter:

A community dedicated to building Africa's widest network of Creative Professionals. Follow us for news, events and more.

This Sunday at the *iHub_, I was dragged to what would be my second Creativez Meetup, having participated in the articultural forum's 1st quarterly Catchup earlier in the year. I was about to get an education that would last a lifetime.

Assembled was a panel of speakers whose combined TV broadcasting acumen and sales instincts appeared to telekinetically move the crowd to silence. No? Maybe just me then. Select members in the panel did, however, have an unrivaled sense of theater in their presentation, most notably Julian Macharia of Buni TV.

Panelists

Julian Macharia

Esther Chiaka

Desmond Orjiako

George Kimani

Also among them was Michael Onyango, Vice Chairman of GOK's Creative Content Taskforce.

 Target your audience

The beginning of the forum focused on a discussion of local content, and the implications of the much publicized Digital Revolution in Kenyan TV. The concensus, however, seemed to be that more channels do not mean more viewership. Business opportunities will undoubtedly increase in TV, but as one of the panelists noted, Digital TV will not improve content; good producers/ writers/ filmmakers will have to do the walkaround and find out what their audience wants, then turn that into content.

From Quote Factory

Relevance engages; forget the technology

We need to tell more good stories, and tell them well. Julian noted that the most successful local shows have not necessarily been the best quality; they do, however, have everyday characters and storylines that Kenyans can relate to. The I-can-make-your-life-a-living-hell watchman (Papa Shirandula), the infuriating cop (Inspekta Mwala), the indomitable stay at home mother-in-law... Gulp.  

Content is a product 

Anyone who considers themselves a 'creative' tends to walk around with an air of 'loving my job' emblazoned on their forehead, convinced they are god’s gift to creativity. A creative's ego and their passion are two regions separated by a boundary about as volatile as that between Pwani and Kenya. Remember while you create, however, that your content is a product. You wouldn't create a soap nobody wants to use and still marvel at its beauty, now, would you? 

Collaborate; and accept oblivion

Michael noted that the creative industry is 'a thankless job', where coming to the fore and expecting to be credited for every effort often results in questionable intentions. At the end of the day, a good product will sell its creative team. Many creatives, including some I am personally acquainted with, will only work together when they assembled separately by the corporate equivalent of Big Sam; a situation that results in a good tonne of content produced without being marketed. In other words, zero work.  

Creative Content is a Business 

What we have in Creativity as Kenya's Film and TV Stakeholders, we lack in Business and Distribution know-how.The tendency to remain attached to our content comes in the way of turning our creativity into a viable commodity. The money, however, will not just come to you. You need to have something solid when the pitch is required. That way, cometh the hour...cometh the money.

Listen; it's a part of the creative skill set

 

I was going to add 'to your elders' in that subtitle, but I realize listening in itself is about as alien a concept as you may introduce to a creative. The fact, however, as was noted by Esther in the presence of her father and boss - Desmond - is that they’ve been talking to the very customers you may need to target. Since before you were born. And they have a right to have an opinion. And ignore yours. 

The crew assembled at the *iHub_ did not, however, ignore. Quite a tonic, I might add. I did get to interact with a couple of them; in fact, to echo Julian's sentiments, I 'threw my love out there and followed the girl who showed interest'. With some promising results, I might add.

Ideas worth listening to? 

• Mike: Kenyan film is underrated because we are not positioning ourselves. We. Need. To. Up. Our game. Period. Quality is in Kenya; quantity is in Nigeria.

• Julian: Kenyans are very selfish. And very aloof. You don't have to be on the landing page of the website for your talent to come through. 

• George: Kenya has never told the MAUMAU story; we have not yet told the statues' stories. It's about time we looked back into our history.

• Esther: You need to start somewhere. Do your time. And go back to school. Education, education, education!

• Desmond: Mold the present to build a better future. You need to produce as much as you consume, complement each other instead of always competing.

*

So if indeed you do consider yourself a creative, turn up for one of these Creativez sessions. It may be the only step you need take before your career trajectory as a creative content producer/ marketer is permanently changed. For the better.

Lessons Learnt

• Don't just land in the market with a product. Do the background work; ensure the content is necessary...and commercially viable.

• Don't choose your money...or your customers.

• Develop your strengths - don't chase the pot of gold and forget the journey.

• A wide screen just makes a bad film twice as bad. - Samuel Goldwyn.

• Kenya will be showcasing her cultural heritage to the 2014 Smithsonian Folklife Festival, at the National Mall of the U.S. in Washington, D.C. for ten days.

• So get the work done. Put together something solid, a pilot Mr(s) Creative. Now.

Suggested reading

Biashara by Roomthinker
Startup lessons learned
The Startup Owner's Manual by Steve Blank
The Path of Warriors and Winners by Steve Blank 

Forget B-School, D-School Is Hot: 'Design Thinking' Concept Gains Traction as More Programs Offer the Problem-Solving Courses